What do you suppose...

“…is the scarcest item in Alaska? Women! Men who run from the States to escape them find that the shortage is a serious problem. They can’t find enough of the ladies to avoid. For the young woman back home, the opportunities in this land, devoid of ruffled curtains and home-baked apple pie, are readily imaginable. The ratio of males to females up thar’ is approximately 25 to 1. Surely any bright, husbandless girl cannot fail to see the desperate situation behind such a statistic and the limitless horizon beyond it.”

— An example paragraph from Shefter’s Guide to Better Compositions, 1960. Saddle up, ladies! Desperate, pie-less men await anything that can drag its penis-free torso up to Seward’s icebox. Your bright future awaits! (Except for the months of endless night. And the chronic alcoholism.)

posted : Friday, April 18th, 2008

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